musical year in review

there were no perfect albums this year but a handful of near perfect ones. i won't get too long winded, just separate them into categories...
  • organic: Troglobite - Blind Cave Salamander and The Dark Age Of Love - This Immortal Coil (a collection of Coil covers. wow.)
  • synthetic: Evenings In Eternity - Coconaut (one of Eric Chamberlain's [Index] projects. beautifully executed.)
  • synthetic with organic elements: Für Euch, Die Ihr Liebt - Helium Vola and Nothing Lasts - Opposite Exhale

i have a feeling Tony Wakeford's latest effort should go there somewhere but i bought it and it never came in. =(
you'd be doing yourself a favor by picking up at least one of these. i'm rarely wrong about these things.
  • Current Music
    signo de aberaccion - hocico

have i mentioned

i adore Coupland?
i picked up (actually it was gifted to me) The Gum Thief hoping, but not expecting, that it would be very good (jPod was possibly the best book i've read in the past decade). i'm only on page 20 and already my side hurts from laughing so much. favorite line so far: "just because you've been born and made it through high school doesn't mean society can't still abort you. wake up."
(note: i said "favorite", not "funniest".)
  • Current Music
    twisted tenderness - electronic

haven't done a survey in awhile...

i'm not bothering with cuts anymore since no one reads anything here anyway so it's intended for facebook.

50 Be Honest Random Questions Survey from

What is your name? - james
Do you have any siblings? - 1 older half brother.
What is your age? - 34
What month were you born? - december
What is your zodiac sign? - sagittarius. are you hitting on me?
Do you have a favorite food? - mongolian bbq.
Are a tad bit crazy like me? hahaha!! - fo sho!
Are you friendly? - not so much.
How many bff's do you have? - none that i know of.
Do you curse a lot? - like a fucking sailor.
Do you laugh a lot? - not so much.
What is your favorite holiday? - new years eve.
What is your favorite type of chip? - kettle brand krinkle cut salt and pepper.
Have you ever been in love? - love is for real people.
Have you ever had surgery? - a few.
Are you a male or a female? - typically male.
Are you close to your family? - sorta. kinda.hmmmmmmmmm...
How long have you been on the computer today? - 8 hours.
Do you like veggies? yummmmm!!! - a select few.
What is favorite drink? - alcoholic = single malt scotch. non-alcoholic = cherry vanila dr. pepper or a nice dark coffee.
Do you like polls? - not so much.
Do you have a bf/gf? - nope. utterly single. that\'s right, envy me.
Do you get along better with the opposite sex? - moreso than i do the same sex.
Have you ever heard of the store deb's? - no
What is your favorite store? - ross
Have you ever written a poem? - many
Have you ever had a poem published? - no
When did you find out santa claus was not real? - my brother broke the news to me when i was around 6.
Do you like twilight or new moon better or neither? - neither
Are your parents still married? - no
Have you ever watched the show everybody hates chris? - no
If i wrote you a letter and did not sign it but wrote you know you want to open thiz would you? - i don\'t even know you. DON\'T GET ALL STALKER-Y ON ME!
What is your favorite subject in school? - it was English.
Who is your favorite author? - Dostoyevsky
What is your favorite book? - Crime & Punishment.
Do you like our current president? - he\'s ok.
Have you had a tough life? - where should i begin...
Are you old enough to vote? - yup but i don\'t.
Do you like to wear socks? - not atm... i'm all about da sandals!
What is your favorite candy bar? - kit kat
Have you ever done anything illegal? - where should i begin...
Have you ever been to court for anything? - where should i begin...
Do you love to look in your stocking at christmas? - don't have one and i fear i never will again
Do you like shopping at old navy? - no
What is your favorite boy name? - i'm happy with Cayden.
What is your favorite girl name? - Chloe
Do you plan on having kids? - NO MORE!
Do you want to get married? - HMPH! i should be so lucky. alas, i'm unloveable.
What time do wake up every morning? - 10-ish
Who is your favorite actress? - jennifer connelly
Who is your favorite actor? - joe pesci
What is the worst thing you have ever tasted? - brains. i don't even remember exactly how they tasted but just the sheer imagery... just reminds me of how susceptible i am to dares.
Its question 53 you can say what you want because it is the last question bye-bye - i'm terrible with goodbyes.

Take This Survey at
  • Current Music
    the mirror pool - lisa gerrard
  • Tags

question for the goths out there

what would you consider to be the most depressing album?

also, it's no Eschatological Laundry List but a neat thing i ran across is...

There may be no tomorrow.

The early worm gets eaten by the bird, so sleep late.

Laughing helps. It’s like jogging on the inside.

Someone else will always have more.

Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened.

You’re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

You won’t always get what you want.

Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you don’t have a leg to stand on.

Nobody can transform your life like you can.
  • Current Music
    serious killer - noisex

mildly updated Laundry List

An Eschatological Laundry List
A Partial Register of the 927 Eternal Truths


1. This is it!

2. There are no hidden meanings.

3. You can't get there from here, and besides there is no place else to go.

4. We are all already dying, and we will be dead for a long time.

5. Justify your existence!

6. Nothing lasts.

7. There is no way of getting all you want.

8. You can't have anything until you let go of it.

9. You only get to keep what you give away.

10. There is no particular reason why you lost out on some things.

11. The world is not necessarily just, being good often does not pay
off and there is no compensation for misfortune.

12. You have a responsibility to do your best nonetheless.

13. Sometimes you're best isn't good enough.

14. Existence isn't meaningless, there's just little reason in it.

15. But is a random universe to which we bring meaning.

16. You don't really control anything.

17. You can't make anyone love you.

18. No one is any stronger or weaker than anyone else.

19. Everyone is, in their own way, vulnerable.

20. There are no great people.

21. If you have a hero, look again; You have diminished yourself in some way.

22. Everyone lies, cheats & pretends. Yes, even me.

23. All evil is potential vitality in need of transformation.

24. All of you is worth something, if you will only own it.

25. Progress is an illusion.

26. Evil can be displaced but never eradicated, as all solutions breed new problems.

27. Yet it is necessary to keep struggling toward solutions.

28. Childhood is a nightmare.

29. But it is very hard to be an on-your-own, take-care-of-yourself-cause
there-is-no-one-else-to-do-it-for-you grown up.

30. Each of us is ultimately alone.

31. The most important things, each person must do for themselves.

32. Love is not enough, but it sure helps.

33. Everyone will eventually leave you.

34. We have only ourselves, and one another. That may not be much, but that's all there is.

35. How strange, that so often, it all seems worth it.

36. We must live with the ambiguity of partial freedom, partial power and partial knowledge.

37. All important decisions must be made on the basis of insufficient data.

38. Yet we are responsible for everything we do.

39. No excuses will be accepted.

40. You can run, but you can't hide.

41. It is most important to run out of scapegoats.

42. We must learn the power of living with our helplessness.

43. The only victory, lies in surrender to oneself.

44. All of the significant battles are waged within yourself.

45. You are free to do whatever you like. You need only face the consequences.

46. The only common denominator in all your failures is you.

47. What do you know... for sure... anyway?

48. Learn to forgive yourself, again and again and again and again and again...


so i just talked to my bitch-ex-roommate and confronted her about half of my cd cases being empty. she steadfastly denies having to do anything with that and her only defense is "all i did was sell your Skinny Puppy cds to Rhino Records*".
can you say PISSED OFF???!!!
sure, i sold the most valuable ones in exchange for gas money to get from seattle to here but... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!

*Rhino Records was/is the local kickass cd store that specializes in goth/industrial/rarities.
  • Current Music
    come clean - curve

who here watches crime shows?

a word has been eluding me that's been driving me NUTS.
imagine, if you will, that you're watching some variation of CSI.
they're studying the killer's past and just found out he/she got divorced 2 weeks ago along with custody of his/her children. they look at each other and one says "i think we just found the _____."
_____ = the development that set them off. i THINK it's also a word for "starts a fire". i wanna say "accelerant" but i know that's wrong. i also THINK it's related to "aggravated stimuli".
fill in the blank and win a million cool points. HELP!
  • Current Music
    etudes for piano vol. 1, no. 1-10 - philip glass